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Sunday, 3 March 2013

5 Sentence Fiction Challenge

My writing friend Marie http://marieohalloran.blogspot.ie/  shared a blog with me that runs a 5 sentence fiction challenge each Thursday.  A prompt is given and off you go, it is a really good exercise. Find out more by visiting the blog at the following link http://lilliemcferrin.com. and do not forget to check out Marie's blog and see her entries also. My first entry is below and the prompt this week is Empty.

Blackmail
He placed the gun barrel to the side of her head. He watched her shaking with fear, sweat and tears fell together on her face. Gently he caressed her wet cheek and she sensed his finger on the trigger moving slowly. Click, it was empty. He laughed at her and walked away.


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20 comments:

  1. Jayne Martin3 March 2013 at 17:18

    Wow! That certainly packed a punch. What a bastard! Great use of the prompt. So much storytelling so concise.

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    Replies
    1. Mary T Bradford3 March 2013 at 21:36

      Thank you jayne, I am glad you enjoyed it. I loved the challenge and I am delighted to have been told about it.

      Delete
  2. Josie Two Shoes3 March 2013 at 17:34

    And I hope that as soon as he walked away she fled for her life... a sick game this time, maybe next time for real. You wrote this very, very well. It happens like this every day!

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    Replies
    1. Mary T Bradford3 March 2013 at 21:37

      Thank you Josie for taking the time to read this. Thank you for commenting

      Delete
  3. kate n3 March 2013 at 21:54

    Really emotive & captured the seen. I was holding my breath!

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    Replies
    1. Mary T Bradford4 March 2013 at 10:13

      Thank you Kate for reading, I appreciate it.

      Delete
  4. Sarah4 March 2013 at 08:46

    A sick game of someone who doesn't comprehend the value of life - powerfully written. Great job!

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    Replies
    1. Mary T Bradford4 March 2013 at 16:42

      Sarah emotional blackmail is terrible and so sad it is out there for many. Thank you for commenting.

      Delete
  5. Anonymous4 March 2013 at 15:18

    Great story Mary, tense with a brilliant twist!

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    Replies
    1. Mary T Bradford4 March 2013 at 16:40

      Thank you Marie, looking forward to catching up.

      Delete
  6. Lisa Shambrook5 March 2013 at 11:18

    Great tension...an awful thing to hold over anyone!

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  7. Robin Leigh Morgan5 March 2013 at 14:57

    What an evil trick to play on someone,,, pulling the trigger on a gun he knew was empty just to have a thrill seeing the fear in his victim's eyes that their life was about to end.

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    Replies
    1. Mary T Bradford5 March 2013 at 17:52

      Yes Robin, it is amazing the evil that is out there. Thank you for your comment.

      Delete
  8. Jazzbumpa5 March 2013 at 20:54

    She should have known from the way he was dressed it was all a hoax.

    He wasn't going to spatter brains and blood all over himself.

    Have you ever tried to get blood out of a silk shirt?

    Impossible!

    Cheers!
    JzB

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous6 March 2013 at 23:33

    You told a chilling tale here, very palpable fear.

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